By Harriet Lerner
From the prestigious writer of The Dance of Anger comes a rare e-book approximately mothering and the way it transforms us -- and all our relations -- inside and outside. Written from her twin viewpoint as a psychologist and a mom, Lerner brings us deeply own stories that run the gamut from the hilarious to the heart-wrenching. From delivery or adoption to the empty nest, the mum Dance teaches the fundamental classes of motherhood: that we aren't in command of what occurs to our youngsters, that the majority of what we fear approximately does not ensue, and that our youngsters will love us with all our imperfections if we will do an identical for them. here's a gloriously witty and relocating publication approximately what it capacity to bounce the mummy dance.
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Additional info for The Mother Dance: How Children Change Your Life
Example text
To have a baby just to give Jackie a sibling. I shouldn’t even consider it. But I worry about her being an only child. ” We both concur that the term only child should probably be dropped from the English language and that Jackie’s pleas are not a good reason to contemplate a second pregnancy. I know from prior conversations that my friend feels strong longings of her own for a second child, but she is fiercely ambivalent, since she knows from experience what a child requires. She and her husband have been considering a second child for almost two years, but whenever one of them is ready, the other is a bit uncertain.
As a pregnant woman yourself, you may experience a traumatic stress, such as losing your mother during this crucial time. Something may be wrong with your baby or you may face an economic crisis or distant partner. Or a number of smaller unexpected stresses will begin to add up. I do not raise these points simply to present a bleak picture. But I do want to provide a realistic counterpoint to the sentimentality that still surrounds our images of new mothers. It’s hard enough to raise a new baby in a relatively calm emotional field, in which the only changes you face are your healthy pregnancy and thriving baby.
I once heard a commentator on public radio voice similar sentiments, so I know I’m not alone in my feelings. My friend is so concerned about her daughter’s wish for a sibling that I do not share my thoughts with her. “I know it’s not a good reason to have another child,” she continues. ” I’ve lost her, thinking about furry little creatures scurrying about. “To have a baby just to give Jackie a sibling. I shouldn’t even consider it. But I worry about her being an only child. ” We both concur that the term only child should probably be dropped from the English language and that Jackie’s pleas are not a good reason to contemplate a second pregnancy.